Announcer: Joe Scheidler and the Pro-Life Action League continue to provide a forum for individuals who were formerly associated with the abortion industry throughout the country. Some of these women were actively involved in Planned Parenthood and the National Organization for Women (NOW). Some were administrators of abortion clinics. The conditions they describe in the abortion industry would not be tolerated in any other segment of medical practice. As you are about to hear in this exposé, criminal negligence resulting in both physical harm and death to women patients of so called "safe, legal abortion clinics" is not hard to find.

Judith Fetrow: Abortion allegedly frees women. This is one of the greatest lies of the feminist agenda: that to be free, to be women, we must be carbon copy men, we must be wombless. That killing children means saving them, and that women are safer, more autonomous, and better able to care for themselves in a dangerous world, if they bear no children.

Joy Davis: Fourteen years ago, I was offered a job in an abortion clinic in Birmingham, Alabama. I thought about the offer and I thought it was really great that I would be helping women, that I would be fighting for a very good cause, so I accepted the job. A very short time after working there I realized one thing, we were not there to help women. We were a business, a money making organization.

Hellen Pendley: I came into a company that was very well established. This particular company is one of the largest in the nation; it does operate abortion clinics to this day --twelve clinics across the United States. When I came into this industry I was asked during my initial interview, "Are you pro-choice?" Well of course I said yes, even though I hadn't thought much about it. The next question I was asked was: "Can you handle the fact that this is a business?", and of course I fit right in --I have a business background, I have a medical background as well. There was no mistaking the fact that I was there to make them money. No one ever said to me, "I hope you're pro-choice because we want you to help these women." I never felt that.

Joy Davis: The conditions in the clinic that I worked at were very, very poor. We had no life support systems. Our people were not very well trained. Most of them were not even --they didn't have a medical background. The doctors rotated in and out; we never had the same doctor. I met a doctor there at the clinic, his name was Tommy Tucker, and he came up to me one day and he said that he wanted to open his own clinic. He said he wanted to do things right. He wanted to have the best equipment possible; he wanted to have highly trained and qualified people working at the clinic. He wanted to do general anesthesia and have anesthetists come in and put these women to sleep so they wouldn't suffer --because in the clinic we worked at they did suffer very much.

Hellen Pendley: Well, I have this noble cause that because I had worked in medicine and I was used to a sterile environment, that I could bring that knowledge into the abortion industry, and I could really begin to try to turn that clinic around so that we could give quality health care to women.

Joy Davis: I thought that was a wonderful idea and I accepted his offer and became the regional director of six abortion clinics in Mississippi and Alabama. We had the best equipment. We had highly trained qualified people. We still lied to the women, that was something we had to do to make money. But we would only see very few women a day, because we didn't want to rush them through like cattle. We wanted to take time and give them the kind of medical attention that they needed.

Hellen Pendley: Well, that sounds real nice, the only problem is that after being in the industry, instead of me changing it, it changed me.

Joan Appleton: I never ever had a doctor in the five years I was there, I never had a doctor who did it because he believed it was a right of the woman. That was not first and foremost ever in his mind. I'm not saying that those doctors don't exist; but you certainly can't prove it with me or by my clinic.

Joy Davis: After just a few months his greed took over. He wasn't making enough money, so the first thing to go was the anesthetist, because they made a lot of money. And through just a few months of watching them put patients to sleep, we started putting patients to sleep ourselves. And we had no idea what we were doing. We just knew what we had seen them do, so we started doing it. Then our registered nurses that worked in our recovery room were the next people to go, and then our lab technician, and on and on.

Hellen Pendley: The first thing I did was clean up the clinic, at least on the outside; but soon I realized that it was going to cut into my bottom line, because, you see, every time we bought a piece of equipment we --like you, had absolutely no life support equipment. We had no crash cart. We didn't have any of those things in the clinic --and in the state of Georgia, which is where I'm from and where I operated this particular clinic, we were regulated by the state, but the state did not require that we have any life support --didn't require that we have recovery room equipment, even though we did perform abortions under general anesthesia.

Luhra Tivis: It's an assembly line process. It doesn't require a lot of capital. Probably the most expensive machine he has there is that sonogram machine.

Hellen Pendley: Because, you see, I was beginning to see things the way the abortionist sees things, which is the more abortions we perform, the more money I'm going to make. That was the bottom line.

Joy Davis: I started interviewing people that had no medical background at all, bringing them in to do the job of anesthetists, lab technicians, nurses, and even physicians.

Dina Madsen: There was no medical background required for the job. You just had to be able accept abortion.

Joan Appleton: I have come to the realization that there is a great deal of diversity among abortion clinics in different states. My clinic in Falls Church, Virginia --we were primarily nurses. I was head nurse of the clinic. My entire staff were nurses or lab technicians, and we really didn't have any non-medical type of personnel outside of the secretarial work. Upon moving to Minnesota, unfortunately, the free standing clinics --what I have found is there are no medical personnel outside of the doctor who is performing the abortion.

Joy Davis: So I brought in people off the street with no medical background and trained them. We were seeing approximately 10 women a day in the clinics, but that wasn't enough. We started seeing as many as we could get in every clinic. But then he --there was no airline fast enough or efficient enough that could get him to all of these clinics. So he trained me to be a physician. I never spent the first day in medical school. I was just an ultrasound technician. I had a business background, but I really knew nothing about medicine, other than what for years I had seen other doctors do. Then I started doing abortions. I started actually performing surgery on women. I did Norplants, cryosurgery, pap smears, pelvic exams --anything he did, I did. And I was real proud of that because I felt I did it better than he did. All of the employees would say, "Oh, you need to see Dr. Davis today", because they felt that I was better than he was. I never had any problem patients. I never put a woman in the hospital, and he was putting them in the hospital almost every month, in very critical conditions --hysterectomies, retained tissue. Everything that could go wrong with his patients did go wrong.

Judith Fetrow: It is difficult to perform abortions for any length of time and continue to believe that the are safe procedures. Even with the best doctors, abortion days are full of minor and sometimes major complications. I watched Dr. William [Pierd] perforate a woman's uterus and then lie about the severity of the perforation.

Dina Madsen: Out of all the women I worked with, several of those, I'd say at least half of them had had abortions, and had repeat abortions, and yet they wouldn't let any of these guys touch them with a ten foot pole. Never. And yet everyday they told these other women: "They're wonderful doctors; they won't hurt you; they're the best at what they do; he's really a nice man"; and sometimes the women would ask, "Well, have you ever had an abortion?" And of course they would say, "Yes, but not by him."

Joy Davis: So I really had a big head; I thought I was great, because I didn't have those problems. I took my time and I gave all this love to those patients. So they really loved me. But the truth is I wasn't giving those patients love. I was risking their life very negligently. Out of the thousands and thousands of patients we've seen, I couldn't remember one name or a face, because they were just a number to me. I would refer to them by how much money they paid. "Oh that's a four hundred dollar case; oh that's a five hundred dollar case". But I didn't see them as people, just a number.

Hellen Pendley: I began to see these women --I never saw them as women. Do you want to know the truth? I never saw them as women. To me, if they were so stupid that they would come in and believe our lies, they deserved exactly what we were going to give them. And that's exactly the way I treated each and every one of them.

Dina Madsen: I have to admit, though, I didn't really have much sympathy for them. My view was: "Well, you got yourself into this position, you better tough it out".

Joy Davis: Then one day a young girl came to us for a late second trimester abortion. You see, we terminated pregnancies all the way up to term. He came in and did her abortion. I monitored on ultrasound while he was doing the abortion, and as soon as he was through, he walked out of the room. She was still under general anesthesia that a non qualified person had put her to sleep.

Hellen Pendley: But in our clinics, our doctors --those were not their patients, that's common around the country. These doctors don't care about their patients. We could see a separation. The OBGYN's that worked in their own private practice and then they'd come to our clinic. If one of our patients had a problem afterward, they called me. That's common. I, like Joy, --I'm not a medical doctor, I'm not trained to evaluate a woman's problems, post operative hemorrhaging, etc. I have no skills that enable me to make that diagnosis and to prescribe a method of treatment, but that was required of me and I did it for three years. When they called me after hours and said "I'm hemorrhaging, what do I do?" That was my problem, not the doctor's. I was the person on call, I was the one who called in all the drugs. I was the one who prescribed the medications.

Joy Davis: I took her to the back recovery room. I stayed with her and did everything I could do to stabilize her, but she started bleeding. She was bleeding a lot and I couldn't stop it. So I ran back to the doctor and I said: "You've got to help me; she's bleeding and I don't know what to do". He said: "Take her to the examining room, examine her, find out why she's bleeding, and stop it. It's that simple; I'm busy".

Judith Fetrow: The most horrifying complication that I witnessed was a woman who stopped breathing during the abortion. Dr. Michael Sussman just walked out of the room when he was finished, despite my telling him that the client was not breathing. He left me alone with her. When Dr. Sussman was forced to return, we didn't even follow emergency protocol for that situation. It was a miracle that this woman didn't die.

Joy Davis: I did everything that I knew to do but she kept bleeding. So I called an ambulance so that we could get her to the hospital and they could help her. He found out that I called the ambulance and got very angry. He canceled the ambulance. He told me --he said, "I'm the doctor here, I'll make those decisions." He said, "We cannot send this patient to the hospital in this condition; they'll hang us." He said, "Now try to stabilize her." But by this time there was blood all over the room, all over me, all over her. It was pouring like a faucet and I couldn't stop it. So I ran back to him and I said: "Please help me. If you don't help me, she's going to die." He said: "Fine, call the ambulance. I have a plane to catch." And he left the building. I called the ambulance. It took 20 minutes for them to get there, and during that time I realized that I was not a doctor, and it scared me so much that I was put in that position, that I let myself be put in that position, to try and save a life that I was not qualified to try and save. The other thing that ran through my mind was that doctor. You see, he was my hero. He brought me up from nothing and I was making approximately $100,000 a year and doing real well, but at that moment I'd seen him for who he was. He was a coward, and he had ran out on the patient that needed him. So they transported her to the hospital and I was so glad that she was just gone, because she was with doctors that could take care of her problems, and that that responsibility had been taken off of me. Until the hospital called me and told me that she had died. I started having nightmares. Every time I would close my eyes I would see her face. The guilt was just so bad that I was feeling for her, the anger that the man that I had looked up to --was so negligent, and it just almost destroyed me. Then the medical board subpoenaed her records. He went one step further and changed her records to make it look like he was not as negligent as he was. He gave me the original records out of her chart and ordered me to go to the basement and burn those records. He said we can't go to court like this. He said: "They'll hang us. We've got to cover this up". He said: "Now, you burn those records right now". But I couldn't do that. I took the records and put them in my briefcase, because I knew I couldn't lie for him on this one. I couldn't cover for him any longer.

Hellen Pendley: We had a personal shredder in my office for that purpose. There would not have been a medical record if the DA had shown up on my doorsteps the next morning.

Joy Davis: So I went to the medical board. I went to the DA, to the District Attorney. I turned over all the information of all the negligence that we had done. I turned myself in for practicing medicine without a license, and gave them the proof that I was doing that. They told me that they wanted me to stay employed with him. They wanted me to continue to gather information for them. They said they had a clear-cut case of negligent homicide, but they wanted more. So I continued to work for him and continued giving them information. But this kept going on and on and nothing was being done. And then one day Dr. Tucker came back to Alabama where I was at; he had been working in Mississippi. And he said: "I had a real hard time in Mississippi and I need you to go to Mississippi, cause we have a problem there and you need to try and calm down the employees". I said, "What happened?" He said, "Well, there was a girl who came in for an abortion. I thought she was 18 weeks; it ended up she was closer to term. I inserted the laminaria. She went into labor and delivered a live healthy baby." "So what did you do?", I asked. He said, "What could I do? I killed the baby." And he said that all the employees were really upset, "So you need to go take to care of this".

Luhra Tivis: And one woman called and she said, "I'm calling for my daughter; you know I want to know how the procedure is done and so forth." And she said, "Have you ever had a live birth?" And it really shook me up to hear that question, because I didn't even think about that. So I asked my supervisor Elana, I said, "What do I tell her? What was she talking about?" And Elana said, "Just tell her we have never had a live birth here at this clinic". I have since found out that's a lie.

Joy Davis: I caught a plane and went to Mississippi, but before I caught that plane I called the district attorney in Mississippi and told him what had happened. Before I could get to the clinic, he was there questioning the employees. The case went to the grand jury, but they couldn't prove that he had killed that baby, because they did not have a baby. The baby disappeared, and they couldn't prove it. So the case did not go on any further, even though the employees testified that it did happen. They still couldn't prove the case.

Luhra Tivis: My office manager had told me, "You know, that --yeah, that's the crematorium in that room". So I knew that's what was in there and she said it's a full size crematorium, just like they have in funeral homes, and I couldn't ignore that machine anymore. I just couldn't --not the least bit. I heard him fire it up. You know, it's a gas powered oven. And the most horrible thing was I could smell those babies burning, because I was just around the corner.

Judith Fetrow: Although workers can be protected from seeing the babies butchered bodies, there is no inoculation to make clinic workers immune to the smell of blood, and the smell of blood permeates the clinic on killing days. Generally, there is one clinic worker in charge of the babies. No one at Planned Parenthood wanted this job. I did not particularly want this job. However, I did not want to see the babies treated disrespectfully. I did not want to hear Janice callously say that she was taking the kids and putting them in day care.

Joy Davis: I went back to the medical board in Alabama and I said, "Why aren't you doing anything? Why haven't you done something about the death of this girl?" They said abortion was a hot political issue and they really didn't want to touch it. The media got a hold of this information and forced the medical boards to take action against the doctor. So he has just been put out of business in Mississippi and Alabama. His license has been pulled. The health department shut down all of his clinics, and he can't hurt anybody else.

Announcer: Money rules the abortion business, as it does most businesses. All the talk of looking out for women is only a pretense for luring more women into the clinic. Let's look at how the abortion industry protects itself.

Hellen Pendley: Part of my job in the industry was to network with other abortion providers. So we formed a group called Georgia Abortion Providers. It was a lobbying group --because, you see, part of this network of abortion providers was to exchange ideas. Atlanta Surgery Center, in Atlanta, Georgia, of course, it was in the news March 11, 1989, when Catherine Pierce underwent a cardiac arrest. The DA came in the very next day and subpoenaed the medical record. They were not closed down, but they did take the medical record and so forth. So immediately a meeting was formed for all of us, not so we could talk about Catherine Pierce and the fact that she was going to die and that she was in a coma, and she did die in October, after spending many months in a nursing home. She never came out of the coma. No one mentioned Catherine Pierce. No one said, "But what about that poor lady?" Because, you know something? We didn't care what happened to her. We cared about what happened to us. We said: "What can we do, so that if we have a death they don't catch us?" That was the focus. That was our focus. That is still the focus. You may be competitors in an industry, but you are going to protect one another. There is unity in the pro-abortion camp.

Luhra Tivis: He makes a million dollars a year, and believe me, he spreads it around, because I mailed out the checks to the legislators, so I know. But, as I said before, he's only one doctor at one clinic. So when I went to work for Planned Parenthood, I had access to their computer, too, and I found out that the year previous to that, the year I had been working for him in '88, he had contributed $15,000 to Planned Parenthood.

Hellen Pendley: I recall one particular campaign of a NAF (National Abortion Federation) conference where a young lady stood up and said we are going to start the Soap Campaign. And that means that "all of you abortion providers when you sleep with your senators and your congressmen, you take a bar of soap. And when it comes time for him to vote, you mail him the soap from that hotel, and you remind him of where his vote needs to be". They play dirty, folks.

Judith Fetrow: I began to wonder if we were really caring for these women or if we were just working for another corporation whose only interest was the bottom line.

Hellen Pendley: In the future, I do believe that we are going to begin to have to deal with a generation of women who have hepatitis B, who are HIV positive because they've contracted it through an abortion procedure. If you re-use a vacuum aspiration, canula you're going to infect the next person. But when you get busy in a clinic, there is no time to sterilize instruments. I'm sorry. You wash them, you repack them, and you re-use them. And then when the state comes in to look at your log book, they have these nice little strips that you just stick in the autoclave and you put a date on there and you put a time and we stick them in by the handfuls, and then we take them out and they show that we ran 15 loads that day, when we didn't.

Joan Appleton: The differences in these clinics have to do with state regulations. The State of Virginia is regulated. Medical staff is required. In many, many, many states there are no state regulations. So, what they end up being actually are legalized back alley abortions.

Hellen Pendley: The State of Georgia is one of those states that is very heavily regulated or technically very heavily regulated, meaning that they are subjected to an annual inspection by a governing body. They are also --we have surprise inspections. They do come in without being announced other than the first inspection. However, some of the material that I brought with me and that I was holding up and showing you this morning, are actual deficiencies listed by this governing arm, such as patients who have a cardiac arrest, although their patient medical record indicates that it was OK for them to --they were healthy and ready to be discharged from the clinic. There are a number of regulations, and the regulations are only as good as the enforcing arm behind it. I also have an original memorandum from the Georgia Department of Human Resources, which is our governing body, that states that they realize that there were some criminal violations that were detected in these clinics as well during their routine inspections. However, because they are not given the authority to act upon criminal codes, it basically has to be dismissed, and there is no action taken. So it does --the rules and regulations vary widely from state to state, most of them are in name only, and unless we begin to push our legislators and say we want some accountability for the agencies that are responsible for inspecting abortion clinics, you're really not going to see a change. You can write laws all day long that make people feel good and give you a warm cozy feeling, but if there is no enforcement, there is no law.

Joan Appleton: The doctors that we use were primarily physicians who were starting out in practice and would do abortions to earn enough money until they had their own private practice going, or they were physicians who didn't have such a hot practice, and used working in abortion clinics to pay for their medical malpractice insurance, which especially for OBGYN's was extremely high all across the country.

Hellen Pendley: Incomplete abortions? Those happen very, very frequently. I kept a file in my office that was separate; it was under lock and key and absolutely no one had access to that but me. Those were our problem patients. Those were pulled out. They were purged from the normal filing system, because we did not want an inspector to come in and routinely pull records and pull those records. Those were the women that we knew we sent home bleeding. They were the women that we knew we sent home with a problem. They were the ones that we knew we were going to hear from again. You see, when I came there we did have a complication log book. "Well," I asked the staff, I said, "would you explain to me how do you gather the data for your statistics?" They said, "Well, we guess". I said, "OK, you guess how many patients have complications after an abortion". So I tell you this because when you stop and look at CDC (Centers for Disease Control) statistics, other statistics that you are going to come across that show just how "safe" legal abortion is, you need to understand who reports those statistics. I have a memorandum that came from our national director of this particular company, and in that memorandum she states, "You do not report it if it's not a hospitalization. I don't care how many times you perforate a uterus, you pack them, you massage the uterus, you give them some ergotrate and you send them home, but you don't report it."

Judith Fetrow: The average clinic worker does not know that there are medical malpractice suits against the clinic where she works. Planned Parenthood does not encourage talk of complications or mistakes. Planned Parenthood workers are not informed of the injuries and deaths that happen at clinics within the same affiliate.

Hellen Pendley: One incident in particular when I was working in the clinic. We had a young girl, she was actually 14 years of age, and this particular doctor came to me and he said, "Hellen, I perforated her uterus, and I pulled the bowel through. What do I do?" I knew what he meant. He wasn't asking me what he should do as a doctor; he was asking me what do I do to make sure that this stays under wraps. So the decision was made, poke it back in and send her home, because I'm going to tell you something, life or death means nothing in a clinic. If you do not respect the life of the unborn, how can you respect the life of the mother and why? It doesn't happen.

Dina Madsen: So I was looking at these babies as something to be disposed of. I didn't see them as important; I didn't see life as important. I didn't value my own life, therefore how could I value anybody else's life? And if these women were stupid enough to get pregnant, then it's their fault. And that's how I felt. And that was how the majority of the staff felt.

Hellen Pendley: Whether she lived or died I do not know. And I wish I could stand here and tell you that I cared, but I didn't. Because you see, I wasn't there to care about women. I knew that in the abortion clinic there are women exploiting women, and I was one of them. There are a lot of things that go on in a clinic that you would not tolerate, if it happened in any other branch of medicine. And I say that speaking as one who is still in the medical industry, but it's important that you understand to what length people in the industry will go to preserve their image. There is nothing that is too low. I say this because I want you to understand that when I worked in the industry there were no delusions of helping anyone. I helped myself to the money. I helped myself to a position of power, and I didn't care how many dead bodies I had to crawl over to get there. I walked in the laboratory every day. I saw dead babies every day for three years. I played with many of them. I never saw a human life, and I never cared. If I could see 50, I was so happy. Because you know what that meant? I was really going to have a good bonus in my next paycheck.

Announcer: The testimonies you have just heard clearly beg a question. While the abortion providers claim that the welfare of women is their principal concern, do they really tell their patients the truth? Let's take a look at some common practices inside the so called "safe", legal abortion clinics.

Joan Appleton: I was convinced that pro-choice was indeed the best thing for women. I began to work more with organizations like Planned Parenthood, NARAL, and NAF on certain projects and began to learn even more. I was issuing birth control pills after an abortion. And this is where I learned the real business and the real work of the abortion industry.

Marian Johnston-Loehner: I was writing to NOW and I would ask them for all their literature and, of course, abortion was a big part of it. And I didn't think about it much at first, but little by little, you begin to accept it all. You take a little bit of their lies and it's like -- you know, an enormous, I don't know how-- a jigsaw puzzle type of thing, but it definitely got all hooked together and you had to accept the whole ball of wax. You couldn't just do away with one part of it.

Joan Appleton: I would be able to counsel a woman and say, "All right we don't want you to have to go through this procedure again; we want to get you started on birth control pills. We'll give you your first packet free" --by the way, because the pharmaceutical companies, they gave it to us free. It's good marketing, so we can distribute one pack free, write a prescription for five month's worth --everybody makes out.

Dina Madsen: Some of the directors I worked with had eight or nine abortions, and we're the same people that would look down on these because they would come in for repeat abortions. How stupid can you get, you know?

Joan Appleton: Now, the pharmaceutical companies and the Planned Parenthoods, and the abortion industries were not stupid. They knew that the less dose of estrogen in those pills, the more likely it was they were going to fail. But you don't have to worry, we can bring you right back for another abortion. So they even used percentages, by the way, 30% failure rate. 30% failure rate because we're going to use a real low estrogen pill, and so that means that 30% of you will come back. And if we forget to tell you, by the way, if you get a flu, if it's in the season, the winter season, and you get a cold, you have to be put on antibiotics. The chemical reaction between the birth control pill and the antibiotic renders the birth control worthless and totally ineffective, so we have another 20%, thank you, that will come back around.

Dina Madsen: Every time she'd come in for an abortion or a D&E we'd stamp, stamp, stamp. Some of these charts are filled up on both sides. And a doctor would take a look at them, "Go --gee if she tries real hard she can come in again before Christmas." And this is somebody who cares about women? I don't think so.

Judith Fetrow: The saddest emotional complications of abortion are the young women who come back for repeat abortions.

Joan Appleton: "And of course we are going to get you on some medication for that venereal disease". And of course that and the birth control pill --well, we know what the antibiotics do. Bingo, we have another 10-15 percent coming back around, thank you.

Dina Madsen: I had a couple of friends in high school who had had abortions and I had a pregnancy scare myself when I was an adolescent and that was the first thing that came to my mind. I never thought of having a baby, I just took it as the general population does, that it is a choice and unfortunately it's often presented as the only choice.

Joan Appleton: And now we're going to go into the schools, and now we are going to teach "safe" sex "because we care about you, we care about women". So, basically, what they are doing today is they are going into the schools and they are saying, "Kids we know you are going to have sex, and we want you to understand we understand that, and that's OK. It means, of course, that two or three or four of you are going to die, but if you use our condoms, and if you use our birth control methods, and if you practice safer sex, only three or four or five of you will die, the rest of you will live. Oh, of course, about 30% will still contract a disease, but we'll take care of it, folks."

Hellen Pendley: You see, we did work from a typed script, but because we understood that we could gain control of that conversation immediately, and then we could start telling her a little about us, what we are saying to her was: "I care about you, I am in control, I am the adult, I've done this before, I am the answer to your problem, no matter what it is". It was a very --it was sales. It was a marketing tool.

Judith Fetrow: I often saw women who had been injured emotionally by abortion. However, my supervisor told me, "If she's having a problem after her abortion, it's because she was having a problem before her abortion".

Hellen Pendley: I had one counselor, though, who approached me and said, "I'd like to start a post abortion syndrome counseling session". Well, of course, I said we can't do that because there is no such thing as post abortion syndrome. This is a counselor who was hearing from a lot of hurting women. But I quickly set her straight: "I don't know where you got your statistics, but they are wrong. There is no such thing." If a woman calls you and says, "I feel terrible, I'm hurting, I'm empty, something's wrong," we were trained to tell her: "If you have a problem, you had it before you had the abortion. It has nothing to do with it. Now, if you need our services again, feel free to call us back. Otherwise, you need to speak to someone else."

Joan Appleton: One of the things that kept bothering me, even during the time that I was head nurse of the clinic, was why it was such an emotional trauma for a woman and such a difficult decision for a woman to make, if it was a natural thing to do? If it was right, why was it so difficult? I had to ask myself that all the time. I asked myself too, I counseled these women so well, they were so sure of their decision, why are they coming back after me now, months and years later, psychological wrecks?

Dina Madsen: A woman would call and I'd make her feel that this was her choice, and that we are going to support her in this choice, because women are looking for someone to support their decision.

Joan Appleton: We deny. We in the pro-choice movement and in the abortion industry, deny that there is anything like post abortion syndrome. Yet, it is real and they do come back and I couldn't deny their presence, and their numbers were increasing, and I kept asking why.

Marian Johnston-Loehner: Feminists were my comrades. We were thick, we were cohorts, we were --you know, there was just no separating our methods and our whole activities that we --we shared a whole different lifestyle. And it is difficult to get out of that lifestyle. It's like a trap. My only desire in the latter 70's and early 80's was to become more liberated, powerful, and in accomplishing the goals of ERA, and helping my sisters to achieve their cherished equal status.

Joan Appleton: I started out in the pro-choice movement believing that I was helping women, believing that women had the right to choose, they had a right to life, they had a right to go on. I felt, when I was counseling women, I was preparing them, I was helping them through a difficult situation, so they could go on with their lives. I told them that they were the most important person on this earth, that nothing was more important than them. "And once we see you through this difficult situation, once this is over, you can go about your life. You now have your freedom, you can go to college." Guess what, folks, it didn't happen. And I had to stop and say: "What's going on? Why isn't this happening? Instead, you're going back out and you're getting pregnant again; you're getting diseases. How am I helping you?" And those are the questions that kept gnawing and gnawing and gnawing at me.

Joy Davis: You see, abortion has gotten so bad, and the greed in abortion has gotten so bad, that they don't care about the women. They certainly don't care about the baby. But now the women are dying.

Hellen Pendley: So, you see, there's a process that happened, and it happens to other people who work in the industry, regardless of what your position is, that's not even --that's irrelevant to the issue. The industry is motivated, it is driven by money. But there is this secret that nobody talks about, which is we have to pretend, at least pretend for the sake of the image that we care about someone, because if people really saw us for the way we are, and could really see our heart, abortion would not have the level of respect that it seems to have in the community and this country at large.

Joan Appleton: If it was right, why are they suffering? What have we done? We created a monster. Now we don't know what to do with it. We created a monster so that we could now be pawns to the abortion industry --those of us women who really, who really still believe in women's rights. Those of us who still believe and care and are pro-woman, who still believe that we are worth something, we are intelligent, we aren't doormats, we aren't something to be used, and we used ourselves. We abused ourselves. And most of us won't accept it. Most of us can't accept it. Most of the people who work in the abortion industry, those who really care and believe it, can't accept the bad part, can't accept the flaws.

Announcer: Is it because the practice of abortion is so "safe" that it does not need to be regulated? Or is it because they have something they want to cover up?

Hellen Pendley: You may hear the media say we care about women. You may hear abortionists say we are standing up for women's rights. We are fighting for women's rights, for the right for you to choose abortion. And that sounds so wonderful. And the American public has bought into that bag of lies. Behind closed doors, we used to joke about the term "pro-choice". In our clinic, the only choice you have is what clinic gets your business. There is no choice.

Judith Fetrow: When someone would show me a picture of an aborted baby and say to me: "This is abortion", I would agree with them. When someone begged me not to kill my baby, I'd look at them and say, "Oh, I'm not here to kill my baby, I'm here to kill other people's babies."

Joy Davis: The fact that I was killing children for a living didn't bother me at all, and I knew that's what we were doing. You see, I was an ultrasound technician, so I knew that it was a living baby in the womb, but it just didn't matter, and it didn't bother me.

Joan Appleton: But I too had seen an ultrasound abortion. It was --we did first trimester-- well, this was late first trimester, probably early second trimester. Legally we could do up to 13.7 weeks, give or take. I can't remember off hand what the specific problem was, but we wanted to do the abortion by ultrasound to make sure that we indeed had gotten the entire --all the baby, or as the terminology-- we wanted to make sure we had the entire pregnancy. I handled the ultrasound while the doctor performed the procedure and I directed him while I was watching the screen. I saw the baby pull away. I saw the baby open his mouth. I had seen "Silent Scream" a number of times, but it didn't affect me. To me it was just more "pro-life propaganda". But I couldn't deny what I saw on the screen. After that procedure I was shaking literally, but managed to pull it together and continue on with the day.

Hellen Pendley: When I was working in the clinic, we had many sidewalk counselors who would show up. I want to tell you what a sidewalk counselor did to us. People are nervous when you're there. There's an atmosphere in the clinic that I can't explain, but for the doctors, for the administrators, it's nothing more than annoyance. "You're upsetting my staff, you're upsetting my schedule, and you're upsetting my day."

Dina Madsen: The reason I was so bothered by confrontation with you is because you convicted me of my wrongdoing, and I didn't want to hear it. I didn't want to hear it. I didn't want to hear "he works in darkness, or there's room for you at the cross," or anything like that. I was terrified. I was terrified, and --cause I got little glimpses of what I was really doing. "You know, they kill babies in there." And I'd smile back and I'd say, "Yeah, I know we do. What are you going to do about it?" But it really did --it convicted me of my own sin and I didn't want to look at it. I couldn't look at it.

Judith Fetrow: Planned Parenthood volunteers, escorts and staff have been instructed not to speak to the pro-life Christians. They have been told this because too many staff and volunteers have been hearing the truth and repenting.

Dina Madsen: I began to see why they do it. And I --that's when I really saw why I was so opposed to it for so long. Because they convicted me of my sin.

Hellen Pendley: That's why we seek injunctions, that's why we don't want sidewalk counselors on the property. It's not so that you can talk the women out of it. It's so that we can keep doing business as usual with no disruptions.

Announcer: As we said at the beginning of this program, things happen in the abortion business every day that would not be tolerated in any other aspect of medicine. Yet the authorities are unwilling to enact or enforce regulations that would guard women against abortion practitioners who maim and kill them.

Joy Davis: When I was in the abortion industry and started having the nightmares and started having all of the guilt and feeling that what we were doing was so wrong, I went to a friend of mine who was an abortionist. He didn't work with me, but he worked at a clinic close by. I went to him and told him about all of the things that I was feeling, about the nightmares and the guilt. He said that he understood very well, because he also had nightmares and that he also had a tremendous amount of guilt. I never asked him why he did abortions, but I knew that he would only do early first trimester pregnancies, because once the nervous system started developing in the baby, he would not terminate that pregnancy because he was afraid that he would hurt that baby. So, he was a very, very unusual man. But he gave me some advice. He said, "The only thing I can tell you is to follow your heart and do what your conscience tells you to do." I asked him if that's what he was doing, and he said" "Yeah, I'm working on it." I'd like to think that he would be here today. I'd like to think that he would have come out. But you see, a couple of days after that conversation, he was shot and killed in front of a Pensacola abortion clinic. His name was Dr. David Gunn.

Dina Madsen: I was still doing the lab work. I was still putting the babies back together, I was still helping the doctor. I had toned down a little bit on that joking and that sarcastic sickness that I had the whole time I was there. And I was changing and it got to the point where I hated to be there. I hated abortion, I hated to be there, I hated coming to work, having to be in that room with that abortionist and those women. I wanted to run and scream; I hated it.

Joan Appleton: My way of getting out of NOW was I was guest speaker at a Virginia NOW dinner. I got up to the podium and said: "Folks, I can't do this any more. There's something wrong here, and I can no longer be a part of the abortion industry or part of the pro-choice movement, and as a result I can no longer be a part of NOW." I was asked to leave immediately.

Hellen Pendley: Each and every time we get up to speak we must re-live something that we have done that now we see as horrible, now we see as murder; it never gets easier. Many of you have sinned at some point of your life, but you're not called to stand in front of a group of people and share the things that you've done and the things that you're ashamed of.

Marian Johnston-Loehner: One day somebody gave me the book by Dr. Jean Garton, "Who Broke the Baby". That book took all the euphemisms that I'd been using for years as a pro-choice advocate and destroyed them, one by one. I would read a couple a night and I would cry and cry, and finally I think that last night that I read, the whole dam broke down, came the tears and all that, and I became repentant --truly sorry for what I had done-- truly sorry that I had taken that life of that innocent child and gave that humanity to that child, because up until then, even after my son, and even after my daughter, I still wasn't willing to admit that a child was a human being from the moment of conception. I was always giving in to the lies.

Hellen Pendley: Life or death means nothing in a clinic. If you do not respect the life of the unborn, how can you respect the life of the mother, and why? It doesn't happen.

Announcer: All those who are entrusted with safeguarding our most basic inalienable rights must take a long hard look at America's abortion industry. We've heard the testimony of those who are in the best position to know the truth about the business of abortion. This is abortion --the inside story.